Brooke is the name of the stylist at Sweetgrass Salon in Little Five Points who fixed my hair on Saturday. Above is a picture of my hair after Brooke performed her miracle - quite a difference. If I ever ask any of you to dye my hair, please say no!
So last night I decided to lighten my hair a little, but things didn't turn out so well. I had bought some Loreal Super Blonde Creme Lightener awhile ago thinking that it was just blonde hair dye. It turns out that Creme Lightener is another word for bleach. Needless to say my hair is not the color I planned but the biggest problem is that it is VERY uneven - there is basically no blonde underneath. I was pretty upset when it first happened, but since that was 24 hours ago I have had some time to get over it. I am going to get if fixed tomorrow, so hopefully it won't look like this much longer. Thought things might be better if y'all could get a laugh out of my last hair dye disaster.
Our great friends, Andrew and Christina, hosted a Going Away Party for us last night with our small group. They made a delicious dinner of salad, green beans, rice, gravy, crispy chicken and homemade pound cake for dessert. It is sad for all of us to talk about us leaving, but we made sure to have lots of laughs as well. We are very lucky to have such wonderful friends. I'll post more pictures as soon as I get them.
Cindi and I taking one of our "do-it-yourself" photos
Yummy...homemade pound cakeClick this link to view a slideshow of pictures of our new apartment. It is in the Northeast Historic District of Kansas City. We are excited about living with Tim's cousin, Michael, having Chris and Katie as our upstairs neighbors, Cherith Brook around the corner and getting to know our other neighbors.
Here is a picture of our front yard. We are going to put a table and chairs out there to be more intentional about knowing our neighbors and spending time outside.
This is our backyard which we hope to add some color to. 
My sister, Jenna, finally had Gavin this morning (Friday) at 5:00am! He was 5lbs 13 oz and 18 1/2 inches long. My mom, my other sister Brittany, Merci, Luke and I were all in the room when he was born. It was such a neat experience for all of us. Even though I flew back to Atlanta just a few hours later and was very tired, it was definitely worth it. Here are some pictures of our new nephew, Gavin!
I noticed many faces missing from church yesterday that I want to share something with. I read a version of the following at the end of the worship service yesterday morning. I've changed it a bit to suit reading on here rather than hearing us say it in person, but this is basically it:
July 8, 2007
In the last year or so Trinity and I have made multiple trips back and forth to Missouri for various reasons. In addition to the regular holiday trip or two, Trinity's grandma had a serious heart attack, I performed my first wedding for my cousin, my sister graduated from college, and you all remember that my grandma died just a little more than a month ago after a couple of years of slow deterioration. Trinity is also going back for a quick trip this week to be there for the birth of her sister's third baby. As you can see, a lot has been going on in the lives of our families. Thankfully we have been able to get back to Missouri for so much of that – we are so grateful to you our church for being so flexible and understanding as we have traveled, and for helping pick up the slack from my absences on some Sundays. But all of this traveling back and forth, and the long distance relationships with our families have been hard on all of us, and after much thought we have reached the difficult decision that it is time for us to move so that we can be there for our families in ways that we cannot be here, at so far a physical distance from them. So, this morning we wanted to let you all know that our last Sunday here with you will be July 29th. My dad is going to come down to help us finish packing Monday, July 30, and we will make the drive up to Missouri on Tuesday, July 31. We will move into our new apartment in Kansas City, MO on August 1st.
We have known for quite a few months now actually that this day was coming soon, we just weren't sure about the details yet, or really about the best way to let you all know about it. As a result of not knowing how to tell people, we have not tried to keep this decision a secret, but we obviously had not made an official announcement yet either, because we didn't want to do it too early. As with so many other milestones of my time of working for this church, neither Trinity or I have ever done this before, so some people have found out at different times and in different ways in the last few months, and others might just be finding out at this very moment. This kind of decision is a hard and messy one, and I hope that everyone understands how difficult it can be to navigate through the timing of letting you all know. I am sure we have not done it perfectly, and perhaps some have wished they had found out in a different way, but I hope that any shock of finding this out will not get in the way of saying goodbye in the coming weeks.
Now, some might think I should ignore this elephant in the room, but you all know I don't do that very well, so let's just get right to it. I know some people are bound to think that we are leaving because of the controversy and accusations some folks made about me. I am not going to tell you that that painful experience has not deeply affected Trinity and me in serious ways, but please believe me when I tell you that that is not why we are leaving. We are not running away because of what happened. We had actually already decided before any of that happened that sometime this summer would be when we moved. It was on our drives back and forth to Missouri last Thanksgiving and Christmas that Trinity and I began talking about moving back there, and I told Jonathan and Gerry about our decision to do so before any of that controversy unfolded. Whatever pain any of us still have as a hold over from that experience, I want this to be clear because I don't want anyone involved in that to get the blame for our leaving. We had already made our decision, and I am deeply saddened that our last six months here unfolded in the way that they did, but none of that changed the fact that this day was coming soon for us anyway. Regardless of what happened, no one deserves to be the scapegoat for the sadness that our moving brings with it.
When friends have grown as close as we have in the last four years, moving is a very hard and sad thing no matter the circumstances, and we must keep that in perspective as we move through the coming weeks together.
We have not reached this decision easily, and there is so much that we wish to say to you friends. This church has meant so much to us these last four years, and we cannot imagine our lives without you. While we are going to gain much by moving closer to our families, you will be greatly missed, and I hope you know that for me our relationship with you all has been one of a kind. I have dreamed of being a minister since I was a small boy, and it is here that you all allowed and encouraged me to dive in and see what that dream was really about. For that I am deeply grateful and I know that I will draw from the lessons learned here for the rest of my life as a minister. God and Trinity and I are still working out the details of what that ministry is going to look like in the coming years, but my relationships and experiences here at this church have been pivotal in that process.
So many of you have also been just plain wonderful friends to Trinity and me, and we hope that we can continue to be friends for years to come. Thank you so much for these years of friendship and support and encouragement through all the good, the bad, and the in-between that we have been through together. We love you very much, and I hope that we can all commit to being creative in the way that we proceed from here. For better or for worse, probably in reality there is a little of both mixed in there, we have approached our roles here in non-traditional ways, and so we are also in non-traditional territory as we say goodbye and as we depart this place. Your guess is as good as mine as to where our relationships will go from here, but we are committed to being as creative with that future as we have been up to this point.
We are not exactly sure what we are going to do when we get to Kansas City – we only know that right now we are following our hearts and the confusing but compelling still small voice of God, which is leading us back to Missouri. When I was at the Cooperative Baptist Fellowship meetings a little over a week ago, a missionary couple told us about their sense of call to a new place in another part of the world – they didn't know exactly what God had for them to do there, but they knew they had to go. As they told their story I felt like they were telling our story. Along with my cousin and some old friends from college we are going to move into a poor urban neighborhood in historic northeast Kansas City and see what God has for us to do there as his hands and his feet. We will likely not get paid for that, but we have faith that we will find other ways to pay our bills. We both plan to find jobs within the community in which we will be living. Trinity plans to enter a Master of Social Work program after we have lived there for a year. I hope that we can keep you all up to date about things as we get settled and enter this new chapter in our lives. Who knows, maybe I'll even start another blog!
Sincerely,
Tim & Trinity Honse
As you can see, we've had this blog for a couple of years now. The original plan had been to keep our families and friends back in Missouri posted on what was going on with us in Atlanta. We didn't do such a good job of updating it frequently, but we want that to change. Now we plan for this to be a place to share with our extended family from Druid Hills Baptist Church, the Atlanta Emergent Cohort, the schools Trinity and I went to, and whoever else wants to check in on us. We will miss you all as we head to Missouri, but we hope this blog will help you stay connected to what we are finding to do in Kansas City.
I am feeling guilty sitting in our apartment this rainy fall Atlanta day because I am enjoying total peace and quiet for the first time in over a year. Our birds John and Yoko have been adopted by someone else and went to live at their new home last night.
We brought them home from the pet store a little over a year ago, and we had a wonderful honeymoon phase, and then a decent post-honeymoon phase, and then I graduated and began spending many of my days at home seeking some rest and peace and quiet and sabbatical... John and Yoko were not very cooperative with that... When I was at school so much I never realized how talkative John and Yoko are all day long, but now though my schedule had changed drastically, their's had not.
The three of us tried to work it out throughout this summer, we experimented with a variety of solutions, but nothing seemed to work, so after much painful deliberation and guilt-filled angst (I wish I was joking, but sadly I really am that feeling) John and Yoko and I decided it would be best to find them a new home. I put some signs up at a few places and yesterday a young man who lives nearby named Ivan called to see if they really were free. He was so excited and called me a few times yesterday with questions and to see if he could come over earlier than we had originally arranged. His enthusiasm helped me feel better about sending them to live with someone else, though I was still sad to see them go, and feeling like I was abandoning them.
A few minutes before Ivan was supposed to arrive I went into the bedroom to say goodbye to John and Yoko and as soon as I began talking to them there was a knock at the front door - Ivan was early! So, we had to rush our goodbyes, but again, it was because Ivan was so excited to meet them.
So today I am enjoying the bittersweet quiet of no constant bird-chirping. I do not regret our decision - I am sure Ivan heaped much deserved attention on them last night and will again today when he returns from school - but it has also been over a year since the apartment has been this quiet during the day, so it will take me some getting used to. On a much, much smaller scale I am sure, I feel like a parent who has just sent their kids off to school for the first day, or to college for the first year; but a difference is that John and Yoko will not be returning. I am glad for all of us, I think they will be better off too, but still I am mourning their departure.
So, goodbye John and Yoko - I hope the two of you will be happy with Ivan. He promised to take good care of you. Get all your chirping out while he's at school and be good to him. I hope Trinity and I's recent Spanish studying will do you some good with Ivan and his family.
Adios y vayan con Dios.
I know it's been a long time since we have posted, so maybe no one even reads this anymore, but I wanted to make an official update on what I'm doing after graduation.
For the last few months or so I have tired of the question of what I am going to do after graduation. I don't really hold it against anyone for asking it in small talk, or for being genuinely curious either, but it still gets old saying the same thing over and over again. I guess if I had more of an "answer to be proud of" then it wouldn't be so bad. Instead of meeting what I percieve to be others' expectations though, my answer is kind of a let down. Do I have big plans after graduation, to further my climb up the church-politic-corporate-ladder by getting a real church position? (Since what I am doing now is "part-time," I guess it doesn't really count...) This is what it feels like people are asking me, whether they really are or not, but maybe it is my own insecurity... I guess this post is kind of an attempt for me to work through that insecurity.
Of course, this is not what I am planning to do after graduation, or ever for that matter. (And I do not mean to imply that I think this is what my fellow graduates who are seeking more traditional positions are doing!! Well, at least not all of them...) Usually my answer goes something like this [with the subtext that I feel like the questioner is thinking in brackets]:
I am just not in a hurry to go anywhere. I love DHBC, and I just don't feel like I am finished there yet. I feel like we as a church are doing great things that I want to continue to be a part of, and I (for better and for worse) have never looked upon this job as a short-term job or a stepping-stone position. Also, Trinity still has a couple of years before she is finished with school, so we plan to be in Atlanta at least that long. I am just not a short-term kind of guy, and I do not want to go somewhere and make a short-term commitment for that two-year or so period. [So, what am I doing after graduation? NOTHING. Yes, I am just a slacker who doesn't want to grow up and get a real job, so I am going to keep working part-time at the church and sit on my butt and watch TV for the other part!]
I am coming to terms somewhat with the stuff in brackets. I think that to some extent it is true. I do not want a real job, because I want to have free time. I cannot remember the last time I felt like I had enough free time to engage my creative side. So, I am intentionally building this in. Maybe I'll take piano lessons or guitar lessons. Maybe I'll write a book! I've even thought about eventually starting some kind of mini-business of my own, helping small churches with technology (websites and projectors and stuff) for a little extra income. Whatever I do will not be "grown up" and "responsible," and maybe won't even help pay the bills, but I know too many people that have sold their souls to pay the bills and I am not going to end up like that!
Trinity is starting full-time at her job after this spring semester (which is why she is going to take a little longer to finish school) so that will (hopefully) make up the slack of paying student loans and paying off the other little bit of debt that we have worked up while in school. We have always talked about making it work in the future with one full-time and one part-time salary so that one of us (preferably me) could be the stay-at-home parent for our kids. Even though we are NOT going to add kids to the equation anytime soon, we have decided to make the next year or two as much of a practice run at that as we can without the kid part!
So, what am I doing after graduation? I am going to keep my wonderfully frustrating part-time job at the church and be a househusband for the rest of the time. Rather than us fighting over who's turn it was to do the dishes or the laundry, these will become my responsibilties. (Trinity will still clean the litter box though - I HATE that job!) Trinity will work full time and take a couple of classes, and come home to a clean house and dinner on the table! If it were the other way around, no one would think twice about the validity of this plan, so we will be doing our part to challenge our sexist cultural norms. Who knows if this will work for us, or how long it will last, but we're going to experiment with it for a little while and see what happens.
(Of course, this might all change tomorrow if I get offered that high-paying powerful church job I just applied for, but we'll cross that bridge if we get to it!)
